When you were in a relationship, did you ever have any vice that you and your partner enjoyed doing together? For example, you like drinking alcohol, Yosi Breaks, staying late just for a midnight call or conversation, running away from your houses or places for the sake of meeting, lying, or even just pigging-out in McDo (it is a vice especially if it’s everyday you are in McDo, or Mang Inasal)? Wait, why is pigging-out part of the list of vices? Practically, according to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, vice refers to “a habitual and usually trivial defect or shortcoming.” Apparently as well, a lot of definitions can come up from the simple use of the word vice and looking it up in different Dictionaries. The thing is, it is still iniquitous. One that can be considered a sin especially if in the end, the product or effect leads to degradation of any aspect, presumably speaking either physical, emotional, mental, etc.. Is writing a vice therefore? Maybe, especially is if it already excessive to the point that you miss some important meetings, etc. just like what I am doing right now. I’m supposedly studying, but I can’t miss a moment of opportunity to share what happened between me and my ex about our vices.
It was in late April that we decided to fully commit in a forbidden premise of love. Forbidden, because the moment we are caught, we might as well kill ourselves because uncloaking this relationship relatively meant turmoil on my half, and my ex’s half. But I don’t know what’s with forbidden things, they have the thrill, the rush, the enigmatic feeling. It’s when you are in this stage that you think you can leave this world, yet you want the feelings to prolong. And so, I ended up degrading things I upheld, e.g., following my parent’s advice to live a student’s life first and not act like family man, remove any sort of distractions, saving for myself (then., my drive is my ex’s presence and just being in a especial place for the two of us). You see, Love can really change and challenge a person even if the intention of changing wasn’t even there in the first place. It’s as if the mere existence of a person makes you realize that whatever issues you have can easily be settled. I had that kind of vision, one that makes me distort the power of reality to show me that some of my actions are vague. But I kept one criterion of my actions consistent, I will never step on anyone just for my happiness. Or, if I did step on anyone, at least I’m going to say sorry.
So what vices did we incur that we are never familiar with? I remember our first time, you know, the kiss. I didn’t expect it to start of with a touch. I was thinking that I would give words first. The words I uttered then was, “are you sure about this?” and we proceeded. Just like in the movie “Mamma Mia!”, when Sophie (Amanda Seyfried) read Donna (Merryl Streep) diary she simply said “dot dot dot”. And that was precisely what happened. It was just a simple “dot dot dot.” I’m not a fan of infatuations but swear, if you can see me right now, I think I’m about to fall and roll on the floor. So there, it became a vice. Not the “dot dot dot” thing, but the kiss. It was the most evident thing I miss the most. The moment when we end it, I can always see the most beautiful lips, the most alluring smile, the most perfectly created eyes, and the smell of life, one that breaths towards me. Even if it was a vice because it takes me out of focus, it kills my time, etc., It was the most pleasurable vice I’ve committed myself with. I was happy, literally felt “heaven on earth.”
I’m in an internet shop, even if it’s just in school (ERC), given that we have time limits in using funded computers and internet connection so I’ll end this here. Every moment of it is Magical. I guess for those who have been, into, still, and hoping for a relationship, you also wish for a vice that both of you will love to do.So, What about you? (more to come…)